Thankful

Wow what a year we've had. Many ups, many downs, but still praising God through it all.

I wanted to make note of what I am thankful for this year....and most times its easier for me to look at the bad side, so this is good therapy for me :)

• First I am thankful for grace and forgiveness.
• I am thankful for my husband
• I am thankful that family is also our friends.
• I am thankful that we found a church and am looking forward to building more relationships there.
• I am thankful that both my husband and I have jobs that not only pay the bills, but that we love.
• I am thankful for a home and two dogs that melt my heart.
• And right at the moment, I am thankful for my french silk pie that I will eat for breakfast!!

Happiness.

What does that mean to you, being happy? I feel like so many people are very wrapped up in 'being happy' lately. I have been wrestling with the idea of God wanting us to be happy. I have seen many people use this as an excuse to live how they please, all in the name of being happy. What does God say?

We studied this at my church a few weeks back. One lie we believe as Christians is that 'God wouldn't want us to be unhappy', and our Pastor said something very challenging: The truth is that God would rather us be obediently suffering than disobediently happy.

I think to Jesus dying on the cross, Mary getting pregnant from the Holy Spirit, Noah building the Arc....all these great people of God who obediently lived for God, and I doubt they were 'happy' doing it. They suffered and came through. God provided for them in the midst of their suffering. He will never fail us as long as we obey Him. Choosing our own path to 'happiness' will lead to destruction. We are either moving toward God, or away from him. There is no neutral, even if we think pursuing happiness has pure motives.

Please Lord, help me to obey you and not look to please myself.

"See to it that no one takes you captive through hollow and deceptive philosophy, which depends on human tradition and the basic principles of this world rather than on Christ." Colossians 2:8

^"But how is it to your credit if you receive a beating for doing wrong and endure it? But if you suffer for doing good and you endure it, this is commendable before God. To this you were called, because Christ suffered for you, leaving you an example, that you should follow in his steps" 1 Peter 2:20-21

Another thought: Happiness is an emotion. Should we live by our emotions? I think thats how we get in trouble. God gives us everlasting JOY, which isn't fleeting and quick lived like happiness.

Proud

I am very proud of this man. He has been promoted, again. Since we have been married he has been promoted 6 times. 6 times in 2.5 years. Whoa. I love his drive and hard working attitude. He has made a good balance of work and family time. He is doing so well it amazes me.

But I am not going to lie...each promotion is very bittersweet. With more money comes the question of kids...and each time its still 'no'. Makes me start to wonder if its not even about the money. It seems like thats what we have been waiting on, more financial security (isn't that what everyone says??) but I wonder if after a gazillion raises if it will still be a 'no'. Breaks my heart most of the time. I want a family more than anything, but I want my husband to want it too. Does anyone know what this is like? I feel so alone. And I am most definitely not going to trick him into getting pregnant. I have contemplated it, no doubt, but its just a terrible thing to do. I want to honor my husband, respect him, follow his lead...but all the while I am sitting here thinking (more at God)' "when the heck will I get the 'desires of my heart'"??!

Obsessed.

With this photo shoot. Oh my the location is just brilliant! Had 3 shoots here this past weekend....heres this cutie:

Hard to say Goodbye :(

The dreaded day came...my best friend Kari moved to Southern California to pursue her dreams...she even has an interview to be an intern for the Jonas Brothers!

Kari and I have been friends for over 7 years, since high school. It was terrible saying bye to her, we both cried and cried!

This is us girls from work at her goodbye party (we work together too)

Here are some old school pictures I dug up!!
Senior Prom:
Junior Prom:
I know I will see you soon Kari! I love you very much!

Happy Halloween!

At work yesterday we all got to dress up. I always have a hard time thinking of costumes for Halloween. Mainly, I don't want to look dumb :)

Here is the group of us, mostly dressed up

This is my costume. I couldn't think of anything, so when I found this shirt at Ross for $4, I bought it and drew a jack o lantern face on it with Sharpie. I know, really lame. Haha I couldn't think of anything!! And I really hate spending money on costumes.

At work we had a pumpkin contest. My boss got these small little craft pumpkins from Michaels that we each had to decorate. I wanted to make something fall-ish so I could have it around the house next year.

Here is my pumpkin:

I would like you all to know that I got 7 votes. The whole month of October I got 7 votes...I came in last :(

This was the winner....a hamburger made by friend Elizabeth. She got 50 votes!
I hope everyone had a fun and safe halloween!