I am very proud of this man. He has been promoted, again. Since we have been married he has been promoted 6 times. 6 times in 2.5 years. Whoa. I love his drive and hard working attitude. He has made a good balance of work and family time. He is doing so well it amazes me. But I am not going to lie...each promotion is very bittersweet. With more money comes the question of kids...and each time its still 'no'. Makes me start to wonder if its not even about the money. It seems like thats what we have been waiting on, more financial security (isn't that what everyone says??) but I wonder if after a gazillion raises if it will still be a 'no'. Breaks my heart most of the time. I want a family more than anything, but I want my husband to want it too. Does anyone know what this is like? I feel so alone. And I am most definitely not going to trick him into getting pregnant. I have contemplated it, no doubt, but its just a terrible thing to do. I want to honor my husband, respect him, follow his lead...but all the while I am sitting here thinking (more at God)' "when the heck will I get the 'desires of my heart'"??!
3 comments:
I thought that you stopped taking birth control because you wanted to be off of the meds? I take it you started taking it again??
My only advice is that marriage is a two-way street and you should talk to your husband to find out why he isn't on the same page as you.
Hi Shannon-
I would definetly have a heart to heart with your hubby...but at the same time, I will honestly say that there is never a perfect time for kids. There will always be 1 more thing you want to do, 1 more goal to reach, 1 more whatever.
I really hope things work out in the best possible way for you!
Yes we have talked about this A LOT. Probably too much where I push him away. We have often decided on a time to 'start', but when the time comes he changes his mind.
Very very heart breaking.
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